Miracle

I keep thinking about this: the day we met. Me on a party for teenagers, you looking at me across the room, I smile, you smile back.
Then a few days later, our paths cross again, you're in this community center, I go because my dad ask me to, and maybe I was too bored and I said yes.

What if?

What if I said no to my dad?

And instead I'd spend the next two years loving strangers, pretending I'm ok with this. I never go to therapy, I never meet your friends so I don't get this job I have right now.

What if?

I think about this quite often,
and I end up thinking that all this was a miracle: our love, my tears, your regrets. I have all this feelings left for you, I'll put them in a box, send them to you wherever you are. Maybe this way I'll stop wondering what the hell went wrong with us.

I'ts been more than 3 years. You still here, even though I said you were dead to me, a part of you survived and still haunts me, every fucking day.